I am going to do a movie review. I may add this feature to my blogs if I watch especially bad movies. I have recently watched an especially bad movie. This one was on Netflix and it was called The Mother, starring Jennifer Lopez. I would give a spoiler alert notification but this movie so cliché and not good that I wouldn’t be spoiling anything. I will give a quick rundown of the plot and bullet point the problems. 

JLo is a former military trained sniper, no family type, who is recruited by an arms dealer who is actually trafficking children and guns. She finds out about the children, exposes the operation, is chased down, tries to make a deal with some government agency, while negotiating in a “safe house” (scare quotes because they are never safe in the movies) bad guy comes for her. Oh, and she’s nine months pregnant at this point. Bad guy stabs her pregnant belly, baby is delivered but adopted. Twelve years later baby is grown up and used as leverage. JLo saves the daughter and the day. 

The problems: 

• The first official female sniper to graduate sniper school was in November 2021. In the present setting of the movie, JLo would’ve had to have been a sniper for 15 years. 
• JLo somehow is an elitely trained in special ops, like Jason Bourne type training. I’m not an expert but I’m sure that’s not part of sniper training. They learn some skills but not elite level. 
• JLo, after safe house is compromised, makes a homemade bomb with plastic jug, flammable chemicals and a six inch candle, a candle that would take hours to melt down but somehow takes minutes. 
• JLo has a secret friend that somehow the usually thorough bad guys don’t know about. Secret friend lives on an isolated island that has a remote cabin. Also, secret friend has a store that stocks everything a fugitive covert sniper op could need. Very convenient. 
• JLo also manages to keep her makeup applied while in hiding. If I were hiding, my appearance would be the last of my concerns. Secret friend ensures she remains a woman.  
• Typical cliché interrogation scene. JLo loses it and starts punching bad guy. Of course her punches don’t seem to hold much punch. Interrogation helper restrains her, and guess what happens next? Waterboarding. How ingenious and out of the box script writing. 
• JLo has daughter in hiding to protect her because she was kidnapped. Daughter is a PETA advocate in training. But per usual in these movie situations, JLo trains daughter in survivor skills. Never saw that coming. 
• Daughter leaves cabin to rescue wolf pups who lost their mom. The elite trained JLo doesn’t even sense her daughter had left. She runs through the snow to find her. All the while her sweater is tucked into the front of her pants, you know like the fashion statement currently vogue among women, to have the shirt tucked into the front of their pants. The whole time she’s running it never comes out.  
• Bad guy finds her because daughter got bit by wolf. Clinic, on the remote island, lists them as mother and daughter. Bad guy sees it and shows up. 
• Final climatic scene. Bad guy shows up with lots of snow machines and guns. JLo is wearing black in a snowy landscape. She manages to kill all of them because a woman is equal to men on an even playing field, of course. 
• In last scene, JLo falls down a hillside, dislocates shoulder. Pops it back in. She sees bad guy driving away with daughter. She manages, with a bad shoulder, to make a head shot, back of the head mind you, on a moving vehicle 500+ yards away. Although it did take two attempts but she’s elite and the bad shoulder hampered her just a little. 

I don’t think I can write any more about the movie. I needed to do this so I could purge it from my brain.  

With the writer’s strike going on, I think they should all be replaced because what they have been churning out has either been woke garbage that no one wants to watch, or rehashed tired plot lines that have beat to death.