Internal memos were recently leaked by anonymous source who was privy to the internal meetings and conversations of the DNC and consultants hired for the campaign.  Once it was determined by backroom deals and promises (which, the source said, will probably be broken), and that the Feel the Bern campaign had become glowing embers, the top insiders and strategists of the Democrat Party had to decided on a running mate. I met the source at a local restaurant, where he handed me the documents on the promise of anonymity.

“The discussions began in earnest,” the source said, “once the Biden became a lock for the Democrat nomination.  At first, it was presented as a joke to have someone like Pinocchio, but then they began to really consider the possibility.

“After a while,” the source continued, “they began to rethink Pinocchio.  At first, the whole idea that we could have him turn into a donkey, like the Democrat logo, and everyone became excited.  Then someone brought up the nose problem.”

I asked what he meant about the nose problem.  “Well, everyone knows spend most of their time lying by making promised they have no intention of keeping.  And when he would stand up there and promise to consider a tax break for the middle class, everyone knows the opposite will happen.”  I nodded in understanding.

“But then someone said Kermit the Frog,” the source added.  “Everyone loves Kermit.  Some others also piped in with names like Animal, but he couldn’t be controlled.  Others said Fozzie the Bear but he might accidentally slip by saying something the Dems didn’t want known in one of his bad jokes.  The old men in the balcony but they said they were like the caricature of Republicans that we always trying to paint.”

I asked why Kermit. “Heck, isn’t it obvious?” the source quipped.  “Everyone grew up with Kermit.  The Muppet Show, Sesame Street, how he tolerated Miss Piggy.  He beloved but everyone and they will believe what he says, because, let’s face it, who would believe that Kermit would be telling a big fat lie to 300 million Americans? You know what I am saying?”

After a moment I asked why a puppet? The source looked at me like I was the dumbest person he has ever met.  Then the source shrugged and said, while dipping a fry in the ketchup, “Because everyone knows that Biden is a puppet who is controlled by others.  It’s an inside joke that he’s not in on.”

I asked how they finally settled Kamala Harris instead of Kermit the Frog.  “Well,” the source said reflectively, “in the end it would be better if it was a human who was the running mate.  I mean, it would’ve been too obvious to have a puppet as a running mate, too much of a tell about Biden.  So they decided on a running mate who would be just as much of a puppet as smooth-talking Dementia Joe, but was a human.”